On Death & dying
As I was out walking this week,
I was struck by the beauty of summer's death: A warm palate of reds, oranges and browns. A crunchy path of fallen leaves.
The theme of death always surfaces for me in the fall, particularly during the month of October.
Everything in nature is dying back, retreating inward and downward. Preparing for deep rest, so that it can bloom again in the spring.
Nature’s cycles are endlessly fascinating.
The emotions of fall are different too —There’s something almost melancholy about the season.
“You expected to be sad in the fall; Part of you died each year.”
The Western world is one of the only cultures that does not celebrate death.
In fact, we are a death denying culture. Every fall, we rake away the decomposing leaves that contribute to soil health. We pull up the root systems used by fungal networks. We cut back the dead flower stalks that serve as winter shelter for pollinators. We ignore nature's innate teachings.
We spend our lives distancing ourselves from death, but it is a natural and necessary part of the life cycle.
In our culture, death is a taboo topic, and, thus, letting go can be extremely difficult; something that we avoid at all costs.
And yet- it's the hanging on and the clinging to what once was that keeps us stuck.
I have been noticing a theme of STUCKNESS and STAGNATION all around me: Clients at work. Friends. Myself.
I believe feeling stuck can originate from FEAR: fear of the unknown, fear of letting go, fear of what might be on the other side.
Ironically, the things that we cling to are often the things that we need to let go of the most: The unfulfilling job. The needy friend. The daily nightcap(s). The putting everyone else’s needs ahead of your own. The people pleasing.
The things we cling to cover up our vulnerabilities and fears. We hang onto the cheating boyfriend because it’s easier than being alone. We overwork and stay in an endless cycle of busy-ness because we fear being not needed.
But here's the thing: If we can let go of the things that we are desperately clinging to, then we create space for something beyond our wildest dreams to manifest. What’s on the other side of your fears might be more beautiful than you can even imagine.
So as we enter this season of the thinning of the veil, this season of death and dying, What is that thing that your soul KNOWS it needs to let go of? What would it feel like to make the decision to let it die NOW rather than waffling for another year (or 10)?
What would it feel like to hold a ritual to celebrate what once was so that you can FULLY move on to what's next?